Let's Go To The Movies

 Hope Thanksgiving was happy for all.

Time off, for me, is always greatly appreciated. I Had a movie marathon over the weekend, which I tend to do from time to time. Nothing beats a well done flick when one is in the mood. Viewing can be the next best thing to traveling and experiencing. I know I'm not Ebert or Roper but I like doing my own reviews from time to time. Not that I expect them to be read or taken seriously but it just gives me something to write about.

   The first two times I watched SICKO by Michael Moore I'm a bit ashamed to say that I went to sleep half way through it.  It seemed like I was just hearing the same stuff I try to tell people every week and as I have said repeatedly in this blog, No one really seems to care. By the third viewing of the DVD I began to realize that the information in the film wasn't boring but that so much information concentrated into a 2 hour film was apparently causing my brain to shut down because there was no way to comprehend the magnitude of what the film was actually saying in such a short period of time. By the fourth viewing I was starting to feel angry but also afraid in the sense that there was now confirmation and documentation of the things I've been thinking all along but somehow hoping that I was wrong. People are actually dying by the thousand every year simply because they don't have access to health care. The propaganda we are fed seems to make us as a society not have a problem with that fact.

   The Brits, French, and even the Cubans receive superior care per capita than Americans and for a fraction of the cost per citizen. Something just ain't right about that. We need to fix it. How? I do not know. Considering what has happened to Medicare under government hands over the past four years, I suggest not letting the current corrupt profiteers of government anywhere near the health care budget. Dealing with Medicaid and it's bureaucratic foolishness has led me to the brink of bankruptcy over the past year. If the same idiots that run Medicare and Medicaid are the people who would be in charge of a National Health Care reform, then I say just leave it like it is because what we have now would just become FUBAR. I personally believe the incompetence within those organizations is probably no better than the effect of the greed within the private sector. I will give the private sector credit for efficiently siphoning away funds from the most needy patients to their stock holders and CEO's. I hate Managed Care Organizations and I'm pretty certain the feeling is mutual. SICKO finally got to me and I found it hard to conceal the rage I feel for the system. The film speaks clearly to why so many feel Hillary must be destroyed. But that only leaves more power to Obama and Edwards. This election will be great to watch. Though I'm a Democrat, Ron Paul and Huckabee speak to some of the issues I feel most passionate about. Somethings' gotta give.

 To assuage my anger and reignite my creative side I popped The Fantastic 4 Rise of The Silver Surfer into the DVD Player.  I love this type of movie since they take me back to childhood and reopen the super hero fantasy world. The days when a creative kid may have pinned on a towel and instantly transformed into Superman or Batman. Ahhh, Those were the days. As an adult one can take the fantasy a step further since adults supposedly have a deeper understanding of emotions and the science behind the fiction. Just watching Jessica Alba is actually worth the 8 bucks. Anyway, I thought the movie was fun and entertaining without exposing a lot of detail here.

Talk To Me starred Oscar Nominee Don Cheadle.  For a while I thought Richard Pryor had come back from the dead and merged with Tim Meadows from Saturday Night Live. Ralph Waldo "Peety" Green was actually a real person who began dee jaying in prison before conning his way into a morning spot on WOL in Washington D.C. back in the 1960s. He had the gift of gab and a natural ability to connect with the common people mainly by just telling it like it is. Naturally, this approach pissed off many in the establishment. His manager took him all the way to Carsons' Tonight Show but once on camera he refused to perform in front of an audience he knew didn't understand him for who he really was. The movie was written from the perspective of Dewey Hughes, his manager, Who had a difficult time forgiving him for blowing the golden opportunity to cross over and make it in the national scene. Peety saw his highlight as the night he calmed the rioters during the hours after Dr. Kings' murder via radio as few other D.J.'s could have done. Peety only lived 53 years but he lived fast, hard, truthfully and didn't give a damn what others thought. It was hard to believe he suffered from severe stage fright despite the tough exterior.

  Last year I wrote about the movie Open Water because of it being a simple psychological thriller that was so frightening because it could so easily happen to almost anyone.  Open Water 2 was even better than the first one, providing all of the suspense without a single shark this time. And all of the principles didn't die this time either. A psychologist must have helped with character development because there were blatant characteristics of Post-traumatic Stress Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, and several other interesting behavior patterns prominently seen throughout the film as each character began to unravel due to facing death in the face so unexpectedly. Of great interest, the case of PTSD was actually cured during the movie by unavoidable emotional trauma assisted by an intact healthy mother instinct. Those who are sensitive and compassionate people will struggle emotionally with this film.

 The Departed  currently playing on HBO is a great cop and gangster flick with a few twists and a high powered cast including Jack Nicholson, Matt Damon, Leonardo Decaprio and others.   I didn't like that the two sexy guys got to sleep with the attractive female psychiatrist. That only happens in Hollywood. Due to the way the movie ended the American Psychiatric Association would have probably given her a break in real life, but in the film her character committed the cardinal taboo incestuous sin not once but twice. Hollywood never portrays the psychiatrist appropriately.

 Those five movies should be enough for any movie buff but I couldn't be satisfied until seeing Denzel in American Gangster.  In retrospect, I would have been disappointed in the film were Denzel and Russell Crowe not a part of it. I think they made it live and breath. It was also great to see veteran Ruby Dee on the screen again. The fact that Frank Lucas was from my home state of North Carolina made the film more interesting for me. Though I feel a drug dealer is the lowest form of life on earth I found it hard not to like Denzel's character. It may have been partially due to the fact of how corrupt the police department and the establishment were and the fact that other mafia establishments were known to exist but not disrupted by the law enforcement system. I think Lucas was mostly addicted to money and power and saw himself as a businessman primarily. There was something redeemable about the character even though his nature was ruthless and vicious  when crossed. He didn't believe in senseless violence but when it was time to take care of business, that he did. Being redeemable, I think he probably got his act together after prison. He probably had enough cash stashed somewhere to go legit.

                                                      

Movies are basically art imitating life. I love movies because of the characters. The stories teach us much about ourselves if we look deep enough.

                                         

Prayer. Does It Really Work?

Does prayer really work or is it just a figment of the imagination?

Most of us are really frightened of taking an honest look at such a question. Somehow we seem to fear that God will strike us down with a bolt of lightening for doubting such a thing. If one really thinks about it, it's not too hard to realize that believing that a bolt of lightning will surge from the sky with the specific purpose of incinerating a living being for a thought that person is having is just simply downright insane. I mean really. I think God would have eventually made the bolt of lightening theory one of the laws of physics, just like the law of gravity, if we were truly struck just a fraction of the times we deserved to be struck. How many people do you know that have have been struck down? Are you aware of any person that could benefit from a good jolt but just hasn't received it? In the context of analyzing this common absurdity of being struck by a lightening bolt, the question of whether prayer works or not is a perfectly sane and legitimate question. The atheist would immediately answer no, where as the agnostic answers I doubt it, and the person of strong faith considers one a fool for posing the question in the first place.

I love psychology and psychiatry because they allow an observer to take a step even beyond philosophy, in my opinion. Philosophy doesn't offer a satisfactory definition for the reality of intuition and intuitive thought. I have no doubts of whether or not intuition exists for I have experienced it many times on different occasions. Intuition can be described as that gut feeling we sometimes experience. Intuition is the act of knowing something to be true by just knowing. Explanations or scientific proof are not required in matters of true intuition. However, there is a thin line between intuition and delusion. Most of the truly great individuals in history were thought by certain others to be a little nuts to the point their fate may have included some brutal form of murder such as crucifixion, burning at the stake, beheading, or mortal gunshot wounds. Was it the victim who was really crazy or the ones who murdered them? In a more modern context we may pose the question if the thousands of lives lost in the Iraq affair have been really worth it? One may convince themselves to believe any of a number of ridiculous rationalizations but it will always boil down to lives for oil and power. Basic law proclaims that deadly force is only the appropriate choice when one is threatened by deadly force. There really should be no exceptions to such a basic and universal law but the human mind is capable of rationalizing anything that benefits the psyche of the individual. Cain felt Abel should die, brother or no brother. I don't recall reading that Cain ever repented or admitted to a mistake, but I could be wrong. But I digress.

Returning to my original point about the effectiveness of prayer, it is my personal belief that prayer does work very much. That said, I do not believe that we will necessarily be satisfied with the answer received. There is even a remedy for this dissatisfaction which is to continue to pray asking God to give you the serenity to accept the things that will not change. We must accept that there is a greater reality than the one we experience in this life. Belief in God mandates that we accept his will, regardless of the emotions we are forced to endure. This can only be accomplished through prayer. Whether or not we believe in prayer or God, for that matter, is irrelevant for it has no impact on what is ultimately true. Everyday almost I listen to a patient tell me that their spouse, family member, or friend doesn't believe in psychiatric medicine. What that person believes will never affect how I approach my work for I possess the enlightenment of past successes and knowledge accumulated. I don't mind telling a patient that if they know somebody that knows something that will work for them better than what I can offer then they are quite foolish not to have taken advantage of it by now. The patient understanding of this point usually does well with treatment.

My life's journey thus far has carried me through many experiences. Many have been unpleasant but I am trying to learn to appreciate the bad experiences as well as the good for it is true that without struggle there is not progress, adversity builds character, and God will never expect us to endure more than that which we are capable of. I'm praying for a miracle for you and for me. Be blessed.

spirituality and mental health

Reflections

 Three days ago I clicked enter to save my entry and something went wrong.

Somehow every word was deleted and lost forever. I wrote it off as an exercise in patience and tolerance since there have been times in the past when such an occurrence would have resulted in great anguish and frustration for me. I'll be more careful with today's' effort. It's hard to believe it will be a new year in less than two months. 2007 thus far has been a period that has been an endurance test for me personally. A female aquaintance recently described her impression of me as being miserable. Being quite fond of this person caused me to feel a bit troubled by such a perception for I know that is not who I am as a person. My suggestion to her was to reserve judgment a while longer. My personality traits consist of unusually high degrees of thinking, feeling, and intuition. This translates to a tendency to often react intensely to acute threats of change or actual change in circumstances. The past couple of years for me have been filled with such threats and changes.

As seen in my writing, I tend to often deal with adversity and controversy through cynicism or sarcasm. Some people refer to it as dry humor. I don't mind occasionally playing the role of devil's advocate just for the sake of argument. Some people don't seem to get this. Others are totally down with the program. To survive in my particular line of work it is essential to have effective ways of venting and maintaining some sort of personal mental balance. Daily reality for me involves facing issues of unexpected deaths from overdose, child sexual abuse, unfixable patients, managing risk to minimize the risk of being sued (lawsuits and threats of lawsuits are inevitable), trying to stay caught up on paperwork, staying in compliance with guidelines of the DEA, Medicaid/Medicare, and the IRS, Continuing Medical Education requirements, credententialing and licensing requirements, medical billing requirements, keeping staff content... There really just isn't time for personal issues.

I'm having to ask myself if this private practice life is worth it. Sometimes the stress is just too great and the compensation much too low. I've discovered several opportunities with salaried positions that would eliminate much of the hassle. On the other hand I love having autonomy which a salaried position does not offer. I've thought hard and heavy about these things over the past weeks and have concluded that for the most part I really enjoy patient care exactly the way I do it now. More importantly, most of my patients are appreciative of the care they receive. The real problem in my opinion are the insurance companies and their need to control. If they were easier to deal with all the other problems could be handled eventually. At the risk of sounding paranoid, I must admit feeling that third party payers intend to run me out of business, mainly because I refuse to run my practice as a prescription writing factory. I believe that psychotherapy is equally as important as the use of medications. Studies have proven this to be true. I plan to fight to continue to practicing psychiatry in the manner I see fit. I realize I may lose the battle but I believe the Lord will make a way, as always.