« Brief Look at Partner Abuse (and Battered Bloggers) | Main | Search for a Silver Lining »
Saturday
Mar172007

Reboot

For a number of reasons, personal and work related, I reached my stress limit...

which began to activate automatic shutdown mode. This requires a weekend brain reboot in order to make it through the next week. The search for mental and emotional refreshment led me to visit the old home place property I purchased last year. My early childhood and much of my adolescence was spent there beginning almost 50 years ago. It seems unreal the way time has flown by. I needed to compare the vivid mental maps from my memory and my frequent dreams to what really existed there today. I expected to look behind the heavy overgrowth and thicket and see the old house. Not a single block or brick remained. The sweet gum quartet that once provided shade for the front yard and porch stood tall after close to 100 years. Even the surface root I walked on as a toddler was not phased by time except for being larger. I noticed that the old cedar tree that was 3rd base during all those ball games had grown immensely. The big oak no longer graced the sky. The septic tank was the only evidence of a house ever being on the property.

I walked to the stream where as a child I couldn't wait to get to and fish for crawfish, chub minnows, tadpoles, salamanders, and baby snakes. There was a slow trickle but no sign of life today. Erosion made it difficult to match any specific part with that in my memory. The garden area seemed so much smaller from what I recalled. Then alas! I noticed a corner foundation pillar of stones of the old barn I once found so intriguing to explore until the wasps repaid me for throwing hot water on their nest. Nothing remained of the structure but the corner pillars and pieces of severely decayed support beams. This was enough for me to re-envision it in my mind. Then something very familiar caught my eye. It was my first basketball goal rim, still painted orange but mostly intact. This image took me back to 1970. I decided to follow the stream back further to see how well my memory matched what was there. I envisioned where my uncle's woodyard once existed. I came upon the old spring where we once drew water to drink and bathe. The spring seemed unchanged. The water still flowed from underground to form a smaller branch that flowed into the larger stream. By this time I decided to find a nice sized stick and proclaim myself explorer, hiker, and archaeologist for a day despite my slacks, dress shirt, and loafers. Except for that it was like being a kid again. I had always been afraid to explore much beyond the spring but today was my opportunity. Not surprisingly, my curiosity about the stream was much easier to quench at age 48 than age 8.

I thought it would be more fun to visit the site where my great grandparents once lived at the top of the hill. This home had been built not too long after the Civil War and even in my childhood memories had decayed almost beyond recognition. I wondered if the place could even be located. It didn't take long to find the spot evidenced by two large stone masonry fireplaces relatively intact. That same trademark of cornerstone foundation pillars was again seen. There were just trace amounts of decayed wood. The tin roof of the out house rested flatly on the ground as its only remain. My great grandmother died at about age 98 when I was less than 2 years old and great grandfather died before I was born. I knew that she loved to grow flowers and had actually picked some with my mother as a kid. Today, it made me happy to see the daffodils and other plants flourishing without being tended for almost 50 years. It felt awesome and an honor to be the only descendant to visit such a place where these people lived so many years ago. My imagination went wild as I envisioned Great Grandfather Job and the men of the day constructing the home and Granny Kissire and the kids sitting by the fireplace or working in the flower garden.

Soon I moved on to find the dirt road that was once so familiar. The mental image did not match but I walked along where I thought the road should be. The road once ended at a now paved state road where the church I used to attend is located. The walk went well and I even thought I found an eroded version of the large stone where I'd always stop to rest when walking to church or to visit my cousins. Eventually, all resemblance of a road had vanished. The pasture where I was once so afraid of the cows came into view and in the distance sat the church, which was good. Had I been thinking like a normal human being I would have climbed the fence and walked the remainder of the distance from within the pasture. But in my quest to win the Lewis and Clark Exploration Award I eventually found myself being attacked by plants in what seemed to be a never ending briar patch. I feel like the deer, racoon, and squirrels were somewhere in the background having a ball laughing at me fighting briars with a stick and yelling ouch. After this exercise in futility I climbed the fence and was on the state road within 5 minutes.The return trip was much less interesting since established routes were used.

This post is one of those personal therapeutic entries that I need to do from time to time to help preserve my own sanity. The take home message is, however, an important part of good mental health hygiene. When your life gets crazy to the point you begin to feel control is slipping away the stage is set to activate your weekend brain reboot by finding something a little crazy to do.

PrintView Printer Friendly Version

EmailEmail Article to Friend

References (28)

References allow you to track sources for this article, as well as articles that were written in response to this article.
  • Response
    Response: Putin Forever
    http://ceidit-calrds.info
  • Response
    Get Rich Quick Programs and Home Based Businesses revealed for what they really are once and for all.
  • Response
    Response: Steve
    Asher
  • Response
    We\'re markedly happy that you\'ve stumbled upon our page dealing with broker forex list make money online trading curren.
  • Response
    Response: Reid
    Nathanael
  • Response
    Response: Michael
    Triston
  • Response
    [...clearly not the case. Instead, investigate claims made by companies with a simple Google search. You'll often...]
  • Response
    Response: Marquis
    Mark
  • Response
    Response: Ahmad
    Jeremy
  • Response
    Response: Marcel
    Santos
  • Response
    Response: Addison
    Robert
  • Response
    Response: Romeo
    Ariel
  • Response
    Response: Jairo
    Colin
  • Response
    Response: Lonnie
    Trevor
  • Response
    Response: Sonny
    Darrel
  • Response
    Response: Kwame
    Ernesto
  • Response
    Response: Gilberto
    Conner
  • Response
    Response: Hassan
    Johnnie
  • Response
    Response: Jaylon
    Reggie
  • Response
    Response: original art
    [...but if it were, I'd go with something more contemporary, as mentioned at...]
  • Response
    Response: Brycen
    Braden
  • Response
    Response: Irvin
    Bo
  • Response
    Response: Brennan
    Jude
  • Response
    Response: Shannon
    Rene
  • Response
    Response: youtube marketing
    [...it's unbelievable what can be written, as was here, when one think's the internet make you...]
  • Response
    Response: Douglas
    Moses
  • Response
    Response: pubic hair removal
    Reboot - Journal - THOUGHTS from The HEADoc
  • Response
    Response: kidblog.org
    Reboot - Journal - THOUGHTS from The HEADoc

Reader Comments (5)

Hi, I came to your site via blog village. After reading your first post I was hooked and spent the entire morning reading through the entire blog. Can't wait to read more. I am glad you got the chance to recharge your batteries and I hope next week is a good one.

March 18, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterMarsha

:) Visit my blog! I voted for ya!


March 19, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterTiana

Hey!

I'm not too sure how much your blog focus's on Psychiatry, but i am very interested in Pscyhology. Infact, I am majoring in psychology. I'v only writtnen one 2 posts on psychology on my blog, but you should check em out.

http://www.make-money-online-quick.blogspot.com/

P.S: Whats your opinion on psychologists prescribing medicine?

March 20, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterSolracSelbor

In special circumstances and with medical backup available it may be acceptable for some psychologists to presribe certain medications if they've been adequately trained. I don't think the AMA or the APA will ever allow it to happen though. I doubt many psychologists would be interested anyway in such a litigious society as the one we live in. But they let managed care insurance workers practice medicine by telling doctors what they can and cannot prescribe so anything is possible.

March 20, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterHEADoc

Wonderful read! I have to occasionally reboot my brain by a wonderful weekend of adventure. I often try to revisit my old home(s) just to see how things are.

March 23, 2007 | Unregistered CommenterKatina Mooneyham

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.

My response is on my own website »
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Post:
 
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>